Saturday, 28 November 2009

Mythical Anxiety

Anxiousness and trouble are both a myth. They emerge from our conception of future, based on past patterns, and from a restricted sense of self. But, when the time passes we wonder , what was it we were worried about. In a sense, this seems to me to be a cycle of life. Even though, I very well understand that what I would worry about would not lead to the same things, I do worry. Its like a routine. Worry first and then feel relived later that you are no longer worried and the in some time pave way for another worry.

Its amazing to realize that , myths, though we know them to be so, never are absent from our beliefs. Our myths are deeply enshrined into our beliefs. They shape our actions and moods , but we always realize later that it was not so.

In one of the articles in NYT, it was said that people do not fear bad times. But they fear that quashing of their hope at the onset of a bad time , in place of a good time. This loss or the fear of loss of a good time in place of a hope a good time is what troubles us the most. Hope and fear , as I have earlier posted are myths. There is no hope nor fear. And the actions are supreme, yet despite of knowing that it is a myth, I and many of us , both hope and fear. And then later realise that it was just another myth.

From a human perspective , it appears that Hope is inevitable and so is fear . Both are complimentary, and when one is asked for other too makes its presence felt. Why is it so difficult to seek the middle path of Buddha, why is it so impossible to break oneself of this chain?

I may never be able to answer that, or I may not be ready enough to face the answer, for it could be lurking within me . But , I how do I forgo effects and betray causes. how do I adopt inaction? How do I live on itself and not try to live? How do I let things their way rather than forcing them. Its difficult for me, as had been for many others, yet, I keep trying so that I do not have to try any longer. To keep practicing so that I do not have do it.

Until it gets undone within me, I will dangle between them, crave and cower, and still try to be human.

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